Carnage on Northern California Cannabis Farms
For the Cannabis growers in Northern California, fear now comes in an eight-foot form. The evidence is as clear as it is terrifying; Sasquatch is real, hates cannabis, and has gone on a murderous rampage. Here are the latest developments.
Bloodlust of Sasquatch
Three bodies were torn to pieces on a dope farm, all the work of Sasquatch. Apparently, this isn’t the first time. Known as the Emerald Triangle, people have been disappearing from cannabis farms in California for some time. The locals know but they won’t talk about it. So how exactly do they know that this crime was the work of Sasquatch? Simple, there was an enormous amount of cash at the crime scene. No murderer could resist such rich booty, thus, this crime was obviously perpetrated by Sasquatch.
Why would Sasquatch go on a killing spree?
One cannot deny the evidence, Sasquatch hates cannabis. Where this hatred comes from, nobody knows. One theory is that young Sasquatch came across a grower’s compost and accidentally ate a ton of pot cookies. Another theory is that his fury comes from lost investments in cannabis stock. We may never know why this great beast is so mad but one thing is certain, the cannabis growers of Northern California should be wary of the fury.
This news is getting out there
On April 20, 2021, the documentary “Sasquatch” made its debut on Hulu. WWE Superstar Chris Jericho didn’t watch the documentary but he had a friend who did, and they talked about it on his podcast. This story is huge and is breaking wide open internationally… even Chris Jericho says so.
Get ready and be prepared
We all need to be ready for a Sasquatch threat so to help you, here is a wordsearch. Go smoke a joint and gather yourself before you begin. Find Sasquatch in the wordsearch below and the supplies you need to defend yourself. Remember, if you ever find yourself facing off with a Sasquatch, assess then approach. If it seems reasonable, try giving it CBD to show that cannabis is positive and doesn’t have to get you high. But, if you can see the bloodlust in its eyes, you will have to fight for your life. Good luck.